Wednesday, April 20, 2016

A Birthday Letter

My Darling Emma

Today you turn 2. It is with some amazement and surprise that we have somehow, by God's grace, survived all this time. We are still struggling with the everyday routines and last night was another classic night of wakes and starts, and lots of tears. I don't think you understood when I told you it is your birthday today. Anyway, I thought I'd pen down some of the wonderful growth we have seen in you over the past year. 

The first half was marked with lots of physical progress - in height, in your progression from walking to running and in activities like being able to feed yourself, take off your shoes and hold a toothbrush. 

We were blessed with having your grandmother look after you at home. You started to go to some play groups, to the local museum and to the library. Often she would also take you on the tube to various places in london - to the tower, to concerts, to the park at Greenwich. You gained a healthy affinity for books and loved to read. Your understanding was opened and you appeared to comprehend everything we said to you, though you didn't say a word. 

You were slow to speak, preferring to listen and observe the world and people around you, but my, have you caught up in the speech department. More on that later. 

We went to Cornwall over Easter, and it was a long car ride, but I don't remember you being too much trouble in the car, though you have categorically refused to be in your infant car seat pretty much all the time. We had a pretty rubbish holiday because it rained everyday, and you were so clingy to me that I had to have breakfast on my own, though we did go swimming which you loved, remembering some of the routines from the swimming class you used to attend. You had your first ice cream in the town of Polperro? 

I had the privilege of a few weeks off work around April, in between jobs. We did quite a lot - went to the British library, the Satchii Gallery, and the Singapore embassy to write in the books of condolence for Lee Kwan Yew, a man you will no doubt learn about. We also took a girls trip to the Cote d'Azure, which was really nice. Mummy was overly ambitious as usual and wanted to see everything between Cannes and Monaco, so we ended up on long bus rides and no time for food which you handled like a trooper, so did Ah Ma. You loved the sea and played with sand for the first time. You have pranced on the red carpet in Cannes, taken the open top bus in Nice and trampled on the grounds on the Monaco palace and casinos. 

And then in June you started Nursery. It must have been so tough for you. From being at home all the time and constant attention to pretty much having to fend for yourself, first for 4 full days a week, to 5. On many days your hours were longer than Mummy's or Daddy's and you did not like being one of the last to be picked up everyday, starting to cry when you see other parents come for their children. But we have been blessed with a good team of teachers and carers who you grew to love and rely on. They also loved you because you were "just so cute", until... One day you decided that you'd misbehave and not follow instructions like the angel they had gotten accustomed to. You have also made some friends. A few months ago I noticed that you could name all your classmates by their photos, now you are more cheeky and would point to a picture, ask me, "who is this?" Before replying your own question with "it's so-and-so". You are now graduating from your first class, "Bumblebees 1" to the next age group "Butterflies 3". We pray that you will find equally good teachers and love the environment, until it changes again. 

If the first half was marked by physical progress, the second was definitely filled with intellectual leaps. You have always been an independent little person, from a very young age, wanting to do things by yourself and your way. And so you refused to learn when we tried to teach you things formally (or at least you would pretend that you're not learning). Instead, you choose to learn through observing and by pressing the buttons on your ABC "iPad" repeatedly. This "teaching" was reinforced through endless hours on YouTube, watching and re watching the same nursery rhymes and shows until you could recite verbatim. That fact I'm not so proud of, because we were determined not to become "iPad" parents and to expose you to too much technology. 

Perhaps it is inevitable in this day and age, and these devices are so intuitive that you figured out how to get to YouTube and play your favourite channels, switching from one to the next and getting rid of distractions along the way like a text that has come in or an advertisement before the real thing. You've also learnt through observation how to make a phone call, which buttons to press and how recognise your daddy's name to phone him. But this will become a stumbling block, dear Emma, we are trying everyday not to feed that "instant gratification" gene in you and to instil ok you the concept of time and tantrum management. We've noticed that you don't like playing with stuffed toys, possible because they are non-interactive or that you're like me and not very good at showing affection. 

However the latter can't be true, because we have also seen a surprising trait of kindness in you. One day last month we were snacking on grapes and you were busy picking them one by one out of the bowl and offering the next one to us the moment we finished one. Since then you have been very concerned that your daddy also gets a piece of your snack. You are generally able to try to share and play with other children - unfortunately your efforts to give them hugs (on command from us) and play together often get repaid with your toys being snatched away (because most children at this age not play alongside other children, not with). I hope you never give up caring and sharing. 

You started talking in earnest around 18-19 months. It started with just a few words but quickly progressed to 2-word full sentence remarks and replies (I'm ready, what happened). You had somehow learnt the difference between me/I and you and now can somehow add the 's to signify possession. Of course, a lot of it comes from copying words we say, but you seem to apply them correctly in the right situations. We are just missing a few conjunctions now ("I want go home now"). We haven't fared so well in Chinese though. apparently we have one more year till the brain nodes stop developing as rapidly in the language department, so we need to work on that with some urgency now... 

We're also starting to experience the start of the "terrible twos". The next year will be a trying one, I can feel it. But it will also be filled with much adventure and much more interaction, as well as many more firsts. How exciting is this journey of life, and how amazing. There is so much in store at every single step. 

Happy 2nd birthday, darling daughter. Thank you for being such a blessing in our lives, and we pray that you will soon come to recognise that the many blessings bestowed on you are from the Giver of all good gifts, your Creator, and also your Saviour.