our vocation

sometimes, i think my sister's the funniest person on the earth. but then again, she's one of the few pple who think i'm funny as well. haha.

she chaired today's YF meeting, and for the closing song, she went. ".... let's sing 'i'm a soldier', to remind us of our vocation", which was well and good since the topic was on the armor of God anyway.

then, she added. "ok, actually it's just alvin's vocation."

......

ok actually it's not that funny anymore. but i was the only person laughing! :\

first week of work

so it's finally friday.

the week has been long, and short. i dunno, i cant decide. but i'm really tired now after coming home really late last night, and i cant think. so im doing mindless stuff like blog instead. it's about 1 hour to lunch.

thank God that the week has been rather smooth, and uneventful. the novelty of work is still there, but i'm beignning to feel the strain, and constraints as well. here are some pics i took yest:


the 'view' from the pathetic little window. but its already a good thing i can actually look out i guess. i think this is lavender/kallang? i don't really know.


my little corner: the laptop strategically turned at an angle away from anyone walking past (can u spot the orange msn toolbar flashing? haha), the magazines i've been flipping through all week, the 2 pathetic files i got, the cup which holds the liquids that keep me going, and the glass panel in front of me which i use as a 'mirror' (i.e. to see who's coming from behind, how sneaky :p reminds me totally of how i used to check the rear mirror while driving in US, only for the cops.)


my colleague, or fellow intern, zhuang man, who's working for the india (south asia) desk. haha we wrote our names and pasted them on the cupboard, in which i hide all my secret treasures (: (read: chocolate and other yummy stuff) also in this picture: the nice big map i printed of ME and north Africa, so that i can finally tell where all the places are. i tell you, i've not learnt so much about the middle east in my entire life than in the last 3 days. information overload. and i think it's gonna grow exponentially over the next 3 months.


the stack of MEED (middle east economic digest) magazines, which are, really outdated, and *clears throat*... dry. most of the stuff are irrelevant anyway, i scan them for the keyword: china. and that's not the only stack btw, i already returned 1 stack, this is my 2nd. but reading some articles here and there are rather eye-opening i must say. i am actually enticed to go visit dubai with its beautiful little palm-shaped offshore islands, or algeria, with its picturesque landscpae, or saudi arabia and the dunes... i'm such a travel freak.


the file. i painstakingly printed maps of each country to stick them onto the dividers, which by the way, i had to improvise on, cos they would only give us the 1st 4 labels, out of 10 (a.k.a leftovers)

overall, i'm generally thankful for a good working envirnment, pleasant pple, and a not-so-stressful job. and nice surprises like bowling later today. except i need my nap first...

i really don't want to work next time. i'll be quite happy slacking at home, thankyouverymuch.

God moves in a mysterious way

God moves in a mysterious way

His wonders to perform;

He plants His footsteps in the sea

And rides upon the storm.

Deep in unfathomable mines

Of never failing skill

He treasures up His bright designs

And works His sovereign will.

Judge not the Lord by feeble sense,

But trust Him for His grace;

Behind a frowning providence

He hides a smiling face.

Blind unbelief is sure to err

And scan His work in vain;

God is His own interpreter,

And He will make it plain.

- William Cowper

Beautiful hymn. Poetic lyrics pregnant with meaning, aptly describing the the sense of awe and thankfulness i feel now.

i got my internship. at last.

nothing glamourous, nothing that i had ever imagined, nothing of my own merit. All of grace and divine providence. The events of the last day have left me truly humbled.

i merely sent in an application for an internship with IE to dubai cos i was enticed by the opportunity to travel. anyhow did the application in the wee hours of the morning because i was rushing the coy law project. the application had closed the day before. i hand delivered the application the next morning, not after getting lost and walking around the entire vicinity. messed up the sealing of the envelope and had to use the hand-dryer in the toilet before hurriedly submitting it to HR.

clean forgot about it until they called me on monday to say that they would like to consider me for a local internship instead, so i half-heartedly agreed to the interview. i tried to make things difficult when the guy called up to arrange for an interview, and the time never got settled that day. the next morning (tuesday), while i was bz preparing for dine-out, they called and said the interview will be that same afternoon. didnt even give it a 2nd thought and thought i'd just go for the interview experience. survived dine-out with a very sunburnt and peeling face, and even had the cheek to slack before the interview. didn't attempt to find out about the company or anything. went for the interview, and arriving at 5pm on the dot because i stupidly took the wrong train to dhoby ghaut instead of bugis. i thought it was finished. all unsettled and unprepared, i chatted with the guy and didn't even know enough about the middle east. wasn't that nervous cos i felt i didn't have anything to lose. tried to sound enthusiastic but i thought he could see through the facade. i even had the nerve to ask for a week off for church camp in june. then i left, again without a 2nd thought.

mulled around in school without being productive. searched out al jilani for a brayani dinner with jm and sebas. the whole time we were talking about how doomed we were because no one wants to hire us. it was quite a reflective chat actually, how we dun really have to be rich and famous to be happy in life. and how we should just apply for the UBS internship that was closing the next day. went home with the intention to study all night, but i never woke up from my nap at 3am. only woke up when the guy from IE called again at 9+ in the morning. i foolishly thought it was ING and gave him all the wrong details like how i applied in jan to the corporate finance dept haha, and treated myself to a false sense of elation when i heard i got the internship. i asked who i was speaking to, and then i realised that it was IE who had called. heh.

then began the flurry of activity.

didn't really want to take it up because i knew/ thought it wouldn't fulfill my acctcy requirements. confirmed with OCS that it couldnt. i even came up with some alternative solutions, but decided to try and ask them to alter the job scope. lots of pple told me it was close to impossible. but since i've already been so thick-skinned, might as well just try. the IE guy kept calling to ask if i'd accepted the internship via ontrac yet.

spent almost the whole day waiting around of emails, every call i made i was so nervous. but beyond my wildest imaginations, they actually did alter the job scope, and it sounded really finance and accountancy related. forwarded to OCS and waited somemore. words cannot describe the sense of relief i felt when they finally replied to say that it was approved.

the job isn't all the applicable to what i really want to do in life (which is nothing, really). neither is the pay anywhere close to decent. but i really cannot complain. that's 1 heavy burden lifted off. so many things depended on this. i can even go for church camp, amazing. i had prayed, but i never really trusted. the thing was, He knew the future all along. I didn't dare to trust. silly me.

Truly, God moves in the most mysterious of ways.
Soli Deo Gloria.

take heart, my friends (esp u, jm). He makes all things beautiful in His time. Do you dare believe?

being a good steward of money

tsk. tried to account for the amount i helped debbie collect on sat, and it was once again proven that i'm a lousy *beep (or whatever sound it is that taboo makes)* steward of money. i never know where my money goes.i really think i've been dropping money or something, sigh. i should keep a ledger for myself! haha maybe my accounting would improve.... heh.

but it's a new week, and once it's over the new week will dawn - the one with the exams. another terrible issue in the lives of lazy students like me. :

in other news, my phone spent the night in the deep (and dusty) hollows behind my bed. conveniently (and clumsily) swiped it off, causing it to plunge about 1.6 metres. there was no way i could retrieve it cos my sis was sleeping below. the thing was, the phone didnt die at all, so when it fell i could see a blue light in the little gap. AND, i set the alarm for 930. so it rang but i couldnt turn it off no matter how much i wanted to sleep some more. haha it was quite an effective way of waking me up! then began the rescue mission. had to carry the heavy mattress away so that the frame would be lighter. and i actually managed to pull the frame out by myself and retrieve the poor phone. i was really quite determined to get my phone back - probably why it felt relatively easier to pull than to push, tho logically pushing should be easier. but my the time i got it back, i didn't really want to exert the same strength to push it back in. shows how powerful the mind is. we can probably accomplish a lot more if i really wanted to. but i'm too laid-back.

ok, since i woke up so early, i better make sure today is well-spent!

an insanely mad day

it's about 2am now. i've been awake since 6am. ok i cheated. only woke up at 6.20am, but i'm just quite amazed that i survived today... really tired but i guess i'll just type this while waiting for mr math freak to be done showering...

had to go to sengkang (read: some forsaken, faraway land that requires a passport.. to that effect) for frisbee IVPs. and i had to be there by 8, which explains the early rise-and-shine. of course i didn't make it. after a tumultous journey, i arrived at 8.20am i think. met yinglu at jurong east and she was going to chinatown for the TCM internship so i was talking to her till then. never knew NEL took so long. and sengkang happens to be the 2nd last stop.

the field was terrible. i really cannot comprehend the rationale for choosing to play at sengkang. plus there are no proper toilet/bath facilities, which greatly impaired my attempts to leave early.

*warning: do not read further if you dun understand ultimate, you'll find it wayyy boring...*

started off with a game against NUS. it started well, but still went down 4-7. was quite happy with myself cos i actually got my name on the stats sheet for once, with a few Ds. but thats cos it was easy to D la, obviously.

the draw was bad, we had 4 back-to-back games. NTU/NIE was up next. those PE teachers.. see how they run! they are insanely fit and fast and i was seriously dying. didn't do a good job and let slip only about a million Ds. tried to handle on O as well. was really glad for the opportunity, but i messed up more than i did well. i believe i have the look, and nowadays i'm not even afraid of the defender (unless it's ryan). but i'm just too lousy.

we went into the NYP game just hoping to hold them off for a while. i think all the girls played well by eliminating their girls from the game, but they were flexible enough to adapt. those pple who commented that our girls cant D for nuts ought to be shot. i think i took that girl out. no more wonderful stats tho. the disc didn't even go her way. heh. but because i'm too lazy and tired to cut, i was bad bad bad on O as well.

playing againt our other SMU team was just crazy. the sun was merciless, and i think i'm now a lobster as a result of that. as a team we didn't play well, but personally i feel that i did my job adequately. peiying's play was rather hampered i think. normally she'll be very active in the game receiving and throwing and all that. but i was so so so tired. got a stitch in tat game (i dunno from what! it was after lunch but i didnt even eat!). sat out for a while but decided to play on since it was ending already anyway. oh i had my first 'accident' in a frisbee game when i actually tried to save a disc but crashed into marc. my back really hurt and i couldnt move for a while, (which really reminded me of the jurong bird park incident eons ago) but it was ok after that i think. hope i dun get back aches when i grow old haha.

sometimes i really just want to give up. and in the middle of feeling so tired, i really really wonder what on earth i was thinking when i decided to join a competitive sport again... and i really just want to quit.

* ok you may resume here...*

anyway i stayed on till the last game before leaving for church. went to compass mall (or whatever it's called) to clean up and then walked out, only to realise that it was pouring. i was quite gleeful and proud of myself for escaping before i really had to be a pig and roll in the mud. but i discovered that they cancelled the game. only because i had to call peiying to find out where on earth the bus stop was. tuns out that she gave me the wrong bus number... grrr.... i think i walked around the perimeter of sengkang central looking for the busstop! and in the rain!
so i managed to be on my way, and did get to church, not before having to run all the way in under the heavy rain becasue the storm cloud decided to split open on me. when i arrived there i was totally soaked. there was no way i could stand up there to make the announcements and do the closing prayer. but we did have song pract for easter till like 7, which made me very late for denise's 21st.

rushed home (tho the bus took forever) to shower and change. i was so incredibly dirty the water was brown. yucks. by the time i got down to mandarin it was like 9+... sigh. socialised and caught up with some pple for a while until like 10plus. and at the same time got the eat my first proper meal of the day. the food was super super good, but i didn't have much appetite. sad.

next destination: marc's house, for the post-IVPs gathering... and it will be appropriate at this juncture to bring in the birthday cake incident. the whole thing wouldnt have happened if i hadnt tried to gei kiang and tried to celebrate someone's birthday at the gathering. suggested it to marc and he said he'll settle cos i wasnt gonna go for the gathering. at 5 plus before i reached church i called him to check if anyone was getting it, and he said no, so i said i'll go get it and bring it really late. so i went to lot 1 to try and get some strawberry cake, was quite happy when the label read 'strawberry short cake' so i happily just bought it. then the aunty had to dash my hopes and tell me that i must refrigerate it immediately. asked the pple at mandarin to refregerate it for me cos i was so scared that the cream would melt or something. anyway, when i was on the way to marc's place, he told me that amy alr got the cake and they just sang the birthday song. diao.... owellz. everyone just had a 2nd cake i guess. and what shortcake, isnt it just sponge cake with strawberries? heh..................

played all kinds of nonsense games and the piano till like 12plus. was so super exhausted i couldnt even think for taboo. but foozball is different. peiy and i beat isaac and gavin 10-1! haha how pro is that! oh the highlight was also having a record number of pple offering to send me home. but i better not elaborate too much, except that i got home safe, sound, and alive.

what a day.