Of the twelveth day of july

This day, 6 years ago, I left everything I knew for an unknown future in a foreign land. Today, 6 years on, we are moving on, not from a country, but from a church fellowship I have grown used to, and mostly quite fond of.

It was slightly emotional, but then again, London is a transient city, people understand when people move on. Everyone puts on a brave front, so true emotions are hard to read. There was a small presentation, which I didn't want but understood that would help prevent any misunderstanding. Quite honestly, I don't think I have done my best in my service over the last 6 years, why they were thanking me so profusely. Looking back, I could have put in a lot more effort, but then that's one of the reasons we had to go. Nonetheless, I felt people were genuine. We took some photos, everything was quite surreal. I keep thinking of what P said, it will be a bigger loss to us than a gain to them. Were we being selfish? Yes, definitely. Does it mean it's not God's will? No I don't think so, if this move will mean an awakening of our spiritual lethargy.

I will miss the people who have made such a big impact on my life. I never told them, but I never want to forget. They looked after me and made me feel like I belong, as we were in the same family of Christ. They celebrated milestones with me, and I with them. They invited me into their homes despite knowing nothing about me, they gave me rides in their cars, and they included me in their plans. They shared generously of their material and spiritual blessings, their time and their love, these constitute a debt I can never repay. I have learnt so much from their godly examples, and also more generally about the way of life in this country in terms of culture, practice, sayings, etc etc. Outside of a church setting, I'm sure I'm not alone in thinking that the British people are one of the most difficult to get close to, but I can confidently say that the common bond in Christ surpasses that. The only thing I can hope to do is keep in close contact and then extend the same hospitality to others. I feel bad that after all the effort on their part, I'm walking away and turning my back. I had a few solitary tears which I blinked away, as I did on my last Sunday in church on 12 July 2009. The situation was so familiar yet so different.

We will rush through the busy week, and next sunday will arrive sooner than I expect. Time to make a fresh start, on a clean slate. It's a tough process, involving considerable emotional investment. Leaving is a hard thing to do, but so is arriving.

Also, we can maybe start thinking about the next big move after this. There are so many things in life to move on from, and to; I pray that our faith will be the one thing that defies that. 1 Cor 15:58.